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March 12, 2001 Issue


  • Columns

    A Democratic Lullaby to Bill Clinton

    As Bush finds backs to pat and hands to shake,
    The Democrats can't seem to buy a break.
    The opposition doesn't coalesce,
    Because the spotlight's on the Clinton mess,
    A mess that's just like catnip to the press.
    Afraid that he will never go away,
    The Democrats by now just want to say,

    Avoid the headlines, can't you, Bill?
    Speak softly, please, not louder.
    Eschew the networks, can't you, Bill?
    Enough, man! Take a powder!

    Ignored as long as he is on the stage,
    The Democrats, befuddled, try to gauge
    How he, amidst the sleaze, seems so unfazed
    While they are crazed, and find themselve amazed
    At all the oxygen the man inhales,
    As he on his sword himself impales.

    Avoid the headlines, can't you, Bill?
    They say. At any cost!
    Eschew the networks, can't you, Bill?
    Could you please just get lost?

    Calvin Trillin