Obama Envy Obama Envy
(Or, Why Isn’t Orange the New Black?) How great am I? As great as one can be. So why do they admire him, not me? The phony press keeps saying he’s got class, Implying I’m a blimp-l…
Jun 21, 2018 / Column / Calvin Trillin
Political Horticulture Political Horticulture
Since one of his administration’s features Is quite a large supply of swamp-like creatures, Perhaps he thinks he’ll make this swamp a garden By offering each miscreant a pardon. T…
Jun 7, 2018 / Column / Calvin Trillin
Drain the Swamp! Drain the Swamp! Drain the Swamp! Drain the Swamp!
This metaphor for cleaning up DC Has now become a Trumpian refrain. The task is getting harder day by day, With Trump appointees clogging up the drain.
May 24, 2018 / Column / Calvin Trillin
It’s a Witch Hunt! It’s a Witch Hunt!
Or Some witchlike people have disguises that May cover up a black and pointy hat. The one nabbed first of all, to Trump’s chagrin, Was “Lock Her Up” adviser Michael Flynn. Then Man…
May 10, 2018 / Column / Calvin Trillin
Trump Threatens Senator Tester Trump Threatens Senator Tester
“I know things about Tester… and if I said them he’d never be elected again.” —Donald Trump That Trumpian threat sounds familiar— That boast of what he can unearth. You think he w…
May 3, 2018 / Column / Calvin Trillin
Depressing White House Personnel News Depressing White House Personnel News
The cable-news folks never tire Of wondering who Trump will fire. Will Kelly’s tries at saying no Mean he will be the next to go? Will Pruitt’s graft at long last force A flight ba…
Apr 26, 2018 / Column / Calvin Trillin
John Bolton Replaces H.R. McMaster John Bolton Replaces H.R. McMaster
We’ve said our farewells to McMaster, Who all hoped would stave off disaster. We’ve now got in charge A nutcase at large. The end of the world may come faster.
Apr 19, 2018 / Column / Calvin Trillin
Laura Ingraham Picks On Parkland High School Student Laura Ingraham Picks On Parkland High School Student
Perhaps she’s now embraced the cause Of feminism fully— Confirming you don’t have to be A male to be a bully.
Apr 5, 2018 / Column / Calvin Trillin
Getting a Job at the White House Getting a Job at the White House
No need to have held any high-level posts Or do brilliant thinking that’s out of the box. No need to be held in the highest repute. You only need comment quite often on Fox.
Mar 29, 2018 / Column / Calvin Trillin
Trump Attacks the Russia Investigation in Twitter Storm Trump Attacks the Russia Investigation in Twitter Storm
Trump’s showing willingness to litter The Internet with trash on Twitter About the probe. Does this show fear That Robert Mueller’s drawing near? This sort of ranting may provide M…
Mar 22, 2018 / Column / Calvin Trillin