Molly, in Her Own Words

Molly, in Her Own Words

From the pages of The Nation, here’s a sampler of Molly Ivins at her best.


There is the mainstream press and then there was Molly Ivins, who always swam against the tide, and who died January 31 at 62 after a brave battle with breast cancer. Molly was… well, rather than tell you what Molly was–others throughout the land have done that–why don’t we just show you? Herewith, from our own pages, a Molly Ivins sampler:

“The bill to make English the Official State Language came to naught, which is just as well since we’d have had to deport the entire state leadership if it was passed. Clements [the governor of Texas]…said he knows the N.C.A.A. has a hard task and he ‘commensurates’ with ’em and he hopes they ‘secede.'”    (August 15/22, 1987)

“Former Congressman Tom Loeffler is now the Reagan Administration’s new point man…for lobbying on aid to the contras. Loeffler…is the guy who thinks you get AIDS through your feet, as we learned when he wore shower caps on his while on a trip to San Francisco, lest he acquire the disease from the bathroom tile.”    (August 15/22, 1987)

“In the line of journalistic duty, I attended the God and Country Rally featuring Phyllis Schlafly, Pat Robertson and Pat Boone, and am filing a worker’s compensation claim against The Nation.”    (September 14, 1992)

On the State Attorney General (Jim Mattox): “He’s so mean he wouldn’t spit in your ear if your brains were on fire.”        (February 7, 1994)

“I have always claimed that being a literate Texan is like being bilingual.”    (July 3, 1995)

“We are also pleased to announce the re-election of Senator Drew Nixon of Carthage: Nixon is the fellow who was found by Dallas police in a car with not one but three prostitutes. He explained he thought they were asking for directions.”    (November 25, 1996)

“We also elected some railroad commissioners, who more or less–mostly less–regulate the oil bidness, and that makes as much sense as anything else in this Great State.”

   (November 25, 1996)

“I know what kind of governor this guy has been–if you expect him to do for the nation what he has for Texas, we need to talk.”    (January 3, 2000)

We could go on, but as Molly might have said, “Well, sheesh.”

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