A Solution at Last A Solution at Last
Likud says it does not anticipate
That Palestinians will have a state.
So they, in turn, are meant to stop this shrying,
And try to make their peace with occupying.
May 16, 2002 / Column / Calvin Trillin
A Short History of the French Presidential Election A Short History of the French Presidential Election
In Paris it began to look Like Jacques Chirac was just a crook, But voters voted for him when He ran against Le Pen again. Though graft is certainly a curse, They figured th...
May 9, 2002 / Column / Calvin Trillin
The Saudis and Their Oil Rigs The Saudis and Their Oil Rigs
(Sung to the tune of "The Farmer and the Cowman" from Oklahoma!) The Saudis and their oil rigs are our friends. Oh, the Saudis and their oil rigs are our friends. They...
May 2, 2002 / Column / Calvin Trillin
A Survey Offering Democrats Two Responses to the Return of Al Gore A Survey Offering Democrats Two Responses to the Return of Al Gore
Al Gore is back:
(1) Alas
(2) Alack
Apr 18, 2002 / Column / Calvin Trillin
Elizabeth Dole Elizabeth Dole
Get set again for Liddy Dole. She's back, to let the good times roll. She's entering another race, Her hair and diction all in place. (Her hair is even more precise Than tha...
Apr 11, 2002 / Column / Calvin Trillin
The Middle East Troubles: A Summary The Middle East Troubles: A Summary
They give each other tit for tat.
The next tat may get Arafat.
Apr 4, 2002 / Column / Calvin Trillin
Nixon Library Woes Nixon Library Woes
The daughters, Trish and Julie, now aren't speaking. Without more dough, the roof will soon be leaking. It really isn't clear just who's in charge. Most tapes and papers still...
Mar 28, 2002 / Column / Calvin Trillin
2002 Remake of Boys’ Town 2002 Remake of Boys’ Town
He ain't heavy, Father, he's my brother.
I can take him by myself from here.
Also, after what we've all been reading,
We don't like to have you priests too near.
Mar 21, 2002 / Column / Calvin Trillin
Billy Graham’s Explanation of His Taped Conversation With Richard Nixon Billy Graham’s Explanation of His Taped Conversation With Richard Nixon
He says that what he said about the Jews
(They own and thus manipulate the news)
Is not, of course, reflective of his views.
So what part of the news did those Jews lose?
Mar 14, 2002 / Column / Calvin Trillin
The Bush Plan for a Shadow Government The Bush Plan for a Shadow Government
A place was found for Mr. Cheney Where, even if the missiles rain, he Can carry on his governing nonstop. They then found bunkers down so far That closed-lip Bushies even are...
Mar 7, 2002 / Column / Calvin Trillin