You say you’re the real thing from Texas—
An Aggie, not someone from Yale.
While claiming to be a straight shooter,
You plant a boot high on a bale.

’Twas cotton that grew on your farm, Rick.
You didn’t grow up on the range.
No horses are used to plant cotton,
So cowboy boots seem mighty strange.

No phony? Then alter your costume.
Although they lack cowboy boots’ zing,
If you have a sod-buster background,
Bib overalls might be the thing.