(Sung by Republican presidential candidates to the tune of “I Dream of Jeannie With the Light Brown Hair.”)

I dream of Sheldon with the bright orange hair.
He need but beckon, and I’m quickly there.
The views of Sheldon are OK by me.
Always I agree, whatever they might be.

Many are the good things about him. I love each.
Mostly, though, I love the way he does free speech.
I dream of Sheldon with the bright orange hair.
He need but beckon, and I’m quickly there.