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Contemplating the Republican Presidential Field, Late-Night Comics Lament

Calvin Trillin

June 1, 2011

So Trump is out. We’ve lost our best buffoon— We’ll surely miss that gaseous air balloon. Oh sure, there’s Newt. Though Newt jokes once were great, They’re getting old. He’s past his sell-by date. Chris Christie was the one we hoped they’d draft. Yes, in our fondest daydreams people laughed As we eyed Christie’s body, fore and aft, Comparing him to William Howard Taft. But Christie has insisted he’ll not run. Is anybody left who’s any fun? Oh Lord, please hear our prayers. We’re on our knees. At least just leave us Sarah Palin—please.

Calvin TrillinCalvin Trillin is The Nation’s “deadline poet.”


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