An Offer From the Oval Office to Open the Federal Government An Offer From the Oval Office to Open the Federal Government
The government opens, concluding this brawl. The fate of the Dreamers is tied to The Wall. This offer by Trump is that he would arrange What simply amounts to a hostage exchange.
Jan 24, 2019 / Column / Calvin Trillin
A Presidential Negotiating Stance A Presidential Negotiating Stance
If he can’t get the wherewithal To build at once his precious wall— A wall that’s thick, a wall that’s tall, The strongest, toughest wall of all— Then to the floor he’ll surely fa…
Jan 10, 2019 / Column / Calvin Trillin
Farewell, Ryan Zinke Farewell, Ryan Zinke
We bid adieu to Ryan Zinke. Though he may well avoid the clink, he Had ethics lapses hardly dinky. They leave that swamp aroma–stinky.
Dec 20, 2018 / Column / Calvin Trillin
Kelly to Leave White House Kelly to Leave White House
Brought in to end the White House mess, He had a measure of success: The ship of state has not been righted, But he himself was not indicted.
Dec 13, 2018 / Column / Calvin Trillin
Staffing the Administration Staffing the Administration
Replacing someone forced to leave Could surely be no easier. Trump looks among the folks he knows, And picks someone who’s sleazier.
Dec 6, 2018 / Column / Calvin Trillin
Trump’s Choice for Acting Attorney General Trump’s Choice for Acting Attorney General
His qualifications don’t really exist. For Trump, though, appointing him didn’t seem odd. A bully, the man was involved in a scam. In other words, they’re like two peas in a pod.
Nov 22, 2018 / Column / Calvin Trillin
The White House and the Caravan The White House and the Caravan
Invasion by tired and poor but not white! We’ll stop them, Trump tells us, of that there’s no doubt. The troops have been sent. Will the Air Force be next? And nuclear weapons—have…
Nov 8, 2018 / Column / Calvin Trillin
The GOP and Voter Suppression The GOP and Voter Suppression
Amidst all the campaigning babble, One strategy’s always worth noting: To keep them from voting against us We simply need keep them from voting,…
Oct 25, 2018 / Column / Calvin Trillin
Donald ❤ Kim Donald ❤ Kim
Trump now says he’s in love with Kim Jong-un. In that seduction, Kim Jong-un was speedy. Some ego-stroking letters did the trick. It’s really simple when a man’s that needy.
Oct 18, 2018 / Column / Calvin Trillin
The FBI/White House Supplemental Background Check on Brett Kavanaugh The FBI/White House Supplemental Background Check on Brett Kavanaugh
If the Federal Bureau had been no more thorough Than that when it was in charge, All the federal pens would have cell blocks left empty, And Dillinger’d still be at large.
Oct 11, 2018 / Column / Calvin Trillin