(George W. Bush explains the interview arrangements he’s made with the 9/11 Commission)

When called upon to testify I said I was a busy guy So maybe we could do it on the phone. They really want a face to face. I said, OK, if that’s the case, I’m certainly not doing it alone.

I can’t appear without my Nanny Dick. For Nanny Dick I’ve got a serious jones. I can’t appear without my Nanny Dick. I love the way he cocks his head and drones.

Cartoonists show me as a dummy,* With voice by Cheney (or by Rummy). I am the butt of every late-night satirist. But I just can’t go solitaire. I need the help that’s due an heir. I need a dad, and dad’s a multilateralist.

I can’t appear without my Nanny Dick. He brings along a gravitas I lack. I can’t appear without my Nanny Dick- The one who knows why we attacked Iraq.

Yes, Condi Rice is quite precise With foreign policy advice On who’s Afghani and who’s Pakistani. I like to have her near in case I just can’t place some foreign face, But Condoleezza Rice is not my nanny.

I can’t appear without my Nanny Dick. I wouldn’t know which facts I should convey. I can’t appear without my Nanny Dick. It’s Nanny Dick who tells me what to say.

* Though Charlie McCarthy’s the dummy Whose name has been most often heard, Some folks who remember that act say I’m closer to Mortimer Snerd.