William Kristol’s Credentials as an Iraq Expert William Kristol’s Credentials as an Iraq Expert
Bill Kristol predicted a war of two months. It’s lasted, we know, somewhat longer. So, even including his chicken-hawk pals, Has anyone ever been wronger?
Jul 2, 2014 / Column / Calvin Trillin
Easy Fix Easy Fix
“Texas GOP supports ‘reparative therapy.’” —CNN Gay marriage ? They’ll stop it, at least in one state. But how? It’s quite simple: turn everyone straight.
Jun 18, 2014 / Column / Calvin Trillin
The VA Scandal The VA Scandal
The verdict’s in on E. Shinseki. Because the VA’s now a wreck, he Must be replaced at last. So let’s Let someone else neglect the vets.
Jun 4, 2014 / Column / Calvin Trillin
No Surprise No Surprise
Karl Rove suggests that Hillary Clinton suffered brain damage. —News reports What’s long been true has gotten even truer: When Karl Rove speaks, he does so from the sewer.
May 21, 2014 / Column / Calvin Trillin
New GOP Icon? New GOP Icon?
The most Republican-leaning company in the country, based on political donations, [is] the company that makes Wonder Bread. —The New York Times So, given what the demographics show, That elephant will simply have to go. To represent the GOP precisely A slice of white bread ought to do quite nicely.
May 14, 2014 / Column / Calvin Trillin
Condoleezza Rice Withdraws as Rutgers Commencement Speaker in Face of Protest Over Her Promotion of the War in Iraq Condoleezza Rice Withdraws as Rutgers Commencement Speaker in Face of Protest Over Her Promotion of the War in Iraq
“We don’t want the smoking gun to be a mushroom cloud.” —Condoleezza Rice, in 2003, on why we had to invade Iraq That quote stood out—the truly catchy one Within the bunkum that the White House spun. It’s made her someone many want to shun. Her smoking gun is now her smoking gun.
May 7, 2014 / Column / Calvin Trillin
A Worshipper in Georgia Prepares for Church A Worshipper in Georgia Prepares for Church
I’m almost dressed in Sunday best. I’ve got my Bible. But I’m stressed: It’s getting late. It’s nine o’clock. Has anybody seen my Glock?
Apr 30, 2014 / Column / Calvin Trillin
Campaign Chant of Red-State Democrats Campaign Chant of Red-State Democrats
Delay the pipeline? I’m opposed. Support Obamacare? Not I. Though, yes, he is the president, I hardly even know the guy.
Apr 23, 2014 / Column / Calvin Trillin
Damaging Compassion Damaging Compassion
Jeb Bush’s sympathy for undocumented immigrants is seen as an obstacle in winning the Republican presidential nomination —News reports Unless, some say, Jeb wants to stay In Florida, with the gators, He’s going to have to change his tune, Or else he’ll lose the haters.
Apr 16, 2014 / Column / Calvin Trillin
I Dream of Sheldon With the Bright Orange Hair I Dream of Sheldon With the Bright Orange Hair
(Sung by Republican presidential candidates to the tune of “I Dream of Jeannie With the Light Brown Hair.”) I dream of Sheldon with the bright orange hair. He need but beckon, and I’m quickly there. The views of Sheldon are OK by me. Always I agree, whatever they might be. Many are the good things about him. I love each. Mostly, though, I love the way he does free speech. I dream of Sheldon with the bright orange hair. He need but beckon, and I’m quickly there.
Apr 8, 2014 / Column / Calvin Trillin