(Sung to the tune of “March of the Siamese Children,” from The King and I, and accompanied by the Secretary herself on the baby grand.)

Condoleezza Rice, who is cold as ice, is precise with her advice. Yes, she is quite precise, and, yes, she’s cold as ice. In her can be found talents that abound. She’s renowned, though tightly wound. Yes, talents can be found, and, yes, she’s tightly wound.

She once avowed we might see a large mushroom cloud if more reign by Hussein were allowed. Which turned out to be: total bushwa, yes, total bushwa. When she accused him of buying tubes only used to make nukes, the truth was abused. And she knew she spoke: total bushwa, yes, total bushwa.

So to serve her guy, she will testify to a lie she hopes you’ll buy–to try to petrify, precisely tell a lie. Condoleezza Rice, who is cold as ice, is precise with her advice. Yes, she is quite precise, and, yes, she’s cold as ice.