Nader Voters: An Explanation Nader Voters: An Explanation
They thought they'd vote the Democratic slate, But somehow felt they needed something more. They finally found a candidate who was More sanctimonious than Albert Gore.
Nov 2, 2000 / Column / Calvin Trillin
Whose Side’s Jesus On? Whose Side’s Jesus On?
Gore says he prays when crises loom. He asks just what would Jesus do. And then he does that very thing (If focus groups would do it too). So whose side's Jesus on, fol...
Oct 26, 2000 / Column / Calvin Trillin
Trick or Treat Trick or Treat
The voters hear on Halloween The country's doorbell ring. There's Bush dressed up as real adult And Gore as human being.
Oct 19, 2000 / Column / Calvin Trillin
On the Events in Serbia On the Events in Serbia
It took them thirteen years to ditch Old Slobodan Milosevic. Now people see a new day dawn, But notice that he's still not gone.
Oct 12, 2000 / Column / Calvin Trillin
On the Fading of the Euro Dream On the Fading of the Euro Dream
Momentum for the euro wanes. The krone is preferred by Danes. And recent surveys all have found That British voters love their pound. But, seeing this through New World eyes,...
Oct 5, 2000 / Column / Calvin Trillin
Newt, Still Newt, Still
When he was king, the Democrats Saw Newt as all that's rotten. Though he's long gone, they're making sure He doesn't get forgotten. On every ad, they talk of Newt's ...
Sep 28, 2000 / Column / Calvin Trillin
A Scientific Observation (Using Some Experts Gail Sheehy Didn’t Know About) on the Speaking Problems That Seem to Run in the Bush Family A Scientific Observation (Using Some Experts Gail Sheehy Didn’t Know About) on the Speaking Problems That Seem to Run in the Bush Family
He thinks that hostile's hostage. He cannot say subliminal. The way Bush treats the language Is bordering on criminal. His daddy had the problem: He used the nounless predicate. Those cowboy boots can do that To people from Connecticut.
Sep 24, 2000 / Column / Calvin Trillin
A Short History of Bill Richardson’s Campaign for the Vice Presidential Nomination A Short History of Bill Richardson’s Campaign for the Vice Presidential Nomination
What Bill was asked to do Bill always did. There was no better soldier on the scene. So why at Veep time won't he get the bid? 'Twas lost behind the copying machine.
Jun 29, 2000 / Column / Calvin Trillin
Oh, Say It Isn’t So, Perot Oh, Say It Isn’t So, Perot
You really think you're going to go-- Just take your dough and leave the show? Oh, well. I guess we'll see you, Ross. We'll manage, somehow, with the loss.
Jun 15, 2000 / Column / Calvin Trillin
A Rise in Unemployment Arrives on Schedule A Rise in Unemployment Arrives on Schedule
You cannot find a job? No cash is flowing? You haven't paid your bills, which have been growing? You'll never get the money you've been owing?
Jun 8, 2000 / Column / Calvin Trillin