Exit Robert (The Torch) Torricelli Exit Robert (The Torch) Torricelli
The Torch could not make folks forget The graft for which he's cited. The only slogan left to use Was "Never been indicted."
Oct 3, 2002 / Column / Calvin Trillin
There’s No, No In Your Eyes There’s No, No In Your Eyes
As Sung to Saddam Hussein by George W. Bush (With apologies to Eddy Howard, and anybody who becomes collateral damage)
Sep 26, 2002 / Column / Calvin Trillin
A Scholarly Analysis of Developments (Including Satellite Photos, A Scholarly Analysis of Developments (Including Satellite Photos,
Osama's split and Wall Street's sagging. It's time to get that puppy wagging.
Sep 19, 2002 / Column / Calvin Trillin
Building a Coalition, W.-Style Building a Coalition, W.-Style
We'll talk to Germany and France, Brief Russians and Chinese, Consult with Turkey and Japan, Then do just as we please.
Sep 12, 2002 / Column / Calvin Trillin
War Against Iraq: The Context War Against Iraq: The Context
The terrorism war begins to sag. The perpetrator we were meant to bag Remains at large, and wartime fervor fades. Then Bush and all his hawkish White House aides Drop sanctio...
Sep 5, 2002 / Column / Calvin Trillin
Richard Perle: Whose Fault Is He? Richard Perle: Whose Fault Is He?
Consider kids who bullied Richard Perle-- Those kids who said Perle threw just like a girl, Those kids who poked poor Perle to show how soft A mamma's boy could be, those kids...
Aug 29, 2002 / Column / Calvin Trillin
The Accidental Commoner The Accidental Commoner
Al Gore is a man of the people. At least, that's the case as we speak. The earth-toney Harvard elitist, Though gone, could return by next week.
Aug 15, 2002 / Column / Calvin Trillin
George W. Bush and Dick Cheney Lecture CEOs on Corporate Responsibility George W. Bush and Dick Cheney Lecture CEOs on Corporate Responsibility
"Creative accounting" is something we hate. From now on your numbers will have to be straight. No taking of options for stock you contrive To dump when insiders can tell it wi...
Aug 1, 2002 / Column / Calvin Trillin
A Spirited Defense of George W. Bush Against Accusations That He Dumped His Harken Stock Because of Inside Information A Spirited Defense of George W. Bush Against Accusations That He Dumped His Harken Stock Because of Inside Information
He says he had no clue the stock would tank. About the details he is still evasive. Though "on the board but clueless" could sound lame, With Bush, a clueless claim sounds qui...
Jul 18, 2002 / Column / Calvin Trillin
On the Congressional Response to the ‘Under God’ Controversy On the Congressional Response to the ‘Under God’ Controversy
They pledge allegiance to the thought That every politician ought To take a stand that's foursquare for the Lord. They think if they say, "God is great! Don't separate him fr...
Jul 3, 2002 / Column / Calvin Trillin