George Bush, Upon Hearing That the Iranians Abandoned Their Nuclear Weapons Program in 2003

deadline poet

By Calvin Trillin

This article appeared in the December 31, 2007 edition of The Nation.

December 12, 2007

Our plans were made, and so well laid, To stop them getting weapon-grade Uranium. I said that we Might well be facing World War Three. So we'd do sanctions in a rush, And then we'd bomb them into mush. But now our operatives insist Those plans for nukes do not exist. Oh, woe is me. Alas, alack. I've no more countries to attack.

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About Calvin Trillin

Calvin Trillin is The Nation's "deadline poet." He has been a staff writer for The New Yorker since 1963 and has written the syndicated weekly column "Uncivil Liberties" since 1986. He has authored many, many books, including Tepper's Not Going Out and Deadline Poet: My Life as a Doggerelist. more...
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