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Deadline Poet | The Nation

Deadline Poet

Calvin Trillin

The first son seemed anointed, then
The tide began to ebb.
Did anybody ever ask,
"So could we bring in Jeb?"

In Kennebunk, land of the Bushes,
The men of the cloth all wore tweed.
And one didn't meet any Christians
Like Robertson, Falwell and Reed.

We mutter adieu now to Steve,
Who finally decided to leave.
We thought he might never be done
With buying his place in the sun.

x

Farewell, adieu to Gary Bauer.
We never thought that you'd be our
Next President. Too small. Too sour.
The countryside we'd have to scour

The Orrin Hatch campaign is done--
Kaput at last, without a doubt.
And now, perhaps, could someone please
Explain what that was all about?

(With apologies, under the table, to Mother Goose)

It seems so familiar to me:
They know one more tank, one more gun'll
Allow best and brightest to see
The light at the end of the tunnel.

(Sung to the tune of "The Ballad of John Henry")

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Calvin Trillin
Calvin Trillin, the author of Random House's Deciding the Next Decider:...

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