So what was the matter with Kasich?
And what was so bad about Dole?
And why did we sour on poor Gary Bauer
And find naught in Hatch to extol?
So after the excitement fades,
We end up with the norm:
Both candidates are regulars
Who say they're for reform.
(A Gilbert and Sullivan Solo for George W. Bush)
The first son seemed anointed, then
The tide began to ebb.
Did anybody ever ask,
"So could we bring in Jeb?"
In Kennebunk, land of the Bushes,
The men of the cloth all wore tweed.
And one didn't meet any Christians
Like Robertson, Falwell and Reed.
We mutter adieu now to Steve,
Who finally decided to leave.
We thought he might never be done
With buying his place in the sun.
Farewell, adieu to Gary Bauer.
We never thought that you'd be our
Next President. Too small. Too sour.
The countryside we'd have to scour