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Deadline Poet | The Nation

Deadline Poet

Calvin Trillin

So what if it's private, in their hacienda?
It's sodomy still, and enough to offend a
Respectable man, and we must never lend a
Leg up to that vile homosexual agenda!

Dejectedly, a man sits on the ground.
The man has been detained. His hands are bound.
His crime is truly simple to explain:
Possessing pictures of Saddam Hussein.

Preferring death to getting caught,
She emptied weapons as she fought.
Though shot and stabbed she didn't flinch.
She battled on, did Private Lynch.
Or did she?

They pushed the CIA to say
That nukes could quickly come our way--
Saddam might, with a finger snap,
Remove Chicago from the map.


A Joyous Song of Deliverance for Spring

When he lands on the deck in his flight suit
To impress all the sailors he's greeting,
It looks grand, but there's one thing we're thinking:

Now Wal-Mart's banned those mags for lads
But so far hasn't banned the scads
Of other soft-core porn on view--
Like busty dolls that do kung fu,

Author

Calvin Trillin
Calvin Trillin, the author of Random House's Deciding the Next Decider:...

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